Finny never tells anyone how he is feeling; you just have to know him well enough to understand when he is sad or scared. Today his expression does not tell me how he feels about me being over here. Either he couldn't care less, or he could be annoyed.

Sorry," I say. "You just look awful." He looks beautiful.

I never know what to do to make you happy, do I?""You make me happier than any other person ever has," I say but he still won't look at me.

I don't know if he's realized that I can't refuse him when he says my name like that.

I love him the most when we fight and I am scared that he will leave me.

I tell myself relationships are hard work. No one is perfect. There's no such thing as happily ever after.

But you and I always remember things the same way.

It was another momen when one of us could have said something, could have given us time, but neither of us did. We looked at each other until I couldn't bear it anymore.

And then she kisses him. And I start reading.

Are you sure you still would want to if you were sober?" I say. Finny nods. "Yeah," he says again. "But I'm only telling you because I'm not.